Knowing how to be a gentleman used to be straightforward: There were codes that were passed down, instilled, and strictly enforced. With both social mores and the nature of masculinity itself wildly in flux, that’s not exactly the case anymore.
Which is why we at GQ put our heads together and pulled in some wise (and well-behaved) outsiders to craft the ultimate guide to being a well-mannered gentleman in 2025. (This is, after all, Gentlemen’s Quarterly.) We’ve considered both the new predicaments guys might be struggling with in this specific day and age, as well as the classic, evergreen rules that men should still adhere to—and could maybe use a good strong reminder of.
This means we’re helping you navigate everything from the modern landscape of online-dating etiquette to how to act in that all-women Pilates class to when (and when not) to pop a Zyn, while offering you a refresher on everything from thank-you notes to how to be a conscientious human being in public to how to act at a dinner party. The result is a list of 125 rules on how to be your best-behaved self wherever you go in 2025 and beyond. Friends, dates, colleagues, and the people sitting beside you on your next flight all thank you for reading.
Other People
We’ll assume you’ve got the basics of being a self-aware human down—but these moves will show you’re uniquely attuned to what other people want, need, and appreciate most.
1. Take out your AirPods when you’re talking to someone. Muting doesn’t count.
2. Ask before vaping indoors. No matter how sly you think you are, other people do notice.
3. If you’re in a situation where you wouldn’t smoke or vape, don’t pop a Zyn either. And go to the bathroom to remove your Zyn.
4. Everyone loves receiving flowers—but most bouquets are cloying and chaotic. If you have a favorite flower, send a small number of stems. If not, you can’t go wrong with a few calla lilies.
5. Always sneeze as if you’re at a library or a funeral. And in the crook of your arm, as if you’re dabbing.
6. Find a signature gift you can give to almost anyone for almost any occasion—and stock up. A specific candle. A specific Champagne. A specific short book. Surprise people when they get married, have a kid, celebrate a birthday, take you to dinner, or invite you over to their house. Be indulgent and indiscriminate.
7. Feeling stuck?
A bottle of good olive oil is the move.
8. When someone you know has a baby,
arrange to send them dinner one night during the first month.
9. Ditto if someone is ill or in the hospital.
Read all 125 rules—including ones on dating, sex, the gym, restaurants, and more—here.
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